Purple Radishes
by Moonofwinds
Summary: A fic loosely based on that old fairy tale, Rapunzel. Only this time it stars Watanuki and Doumeki.


Purple Radishes

By Robyn Thomson

Exclaimer:

_I do not own any of the characters of XXXholic, they and the inspiration of this story are the property of Clamp. The base of this story is__** loosely **__based, I mean __**LOOSELY**__, on a story by the brother's Grimm who inevitably got it originally from old folklore. In short, everyone owns the meat of this fanfic but me, but I am the one that but it all together._

The plan had been to walk home from school with Himawari and bask in the glory that was her radiance. Watanuki had been spending far too much time running Yuko's many bizarre and potentially deadly chores. But on what day did Watanuki ever succeed in carrying out his plans to fruition?

On his way outside on lunch break, Watanuki found his path crossed by Mokona. The animated stuffed thing refused to ignore the lanky teen's endless attempts to escape. Watanuki ran down a different hall, stumbling into many a classmate, he even hid in the boys washroom, for a few moments Watanuki thought he had escape the persistent creature, but in the end upon his exit into the courtyard, Watanuki found his path blocked by the black creation.

"Get out of the way, Mokona!" Watanuki half ordered, half begged in a shrill voice. "Today is my first day off in weeks. I am not going to Yuko's store."

"Yuko has an errand for Watanuki! There are purple radishes in the garden of a mansion in the hill outside of town. Yuko wants them for dinner tonight."

"Can't you get them?" Watanuki whined and slouched in his depression.

"Watanuki MUST get them, Yuko said!" Mokana puffed himself up as he spoke.

"Fine," Watanuki sighed. It was simply impossible to fight Yuko.

Rather than spending a glorious day with Himawari, Watanuki found himself lumbering up a long and jagged dirt road. It twisted and turned up the hill, and seemed to go on for eternity. Hours passed before Watanuki found himself, panting with exhaustion and staring up at a wall that must have been twenty feet tall with no gate in sight.

"All for some stupid radishes," Watanuki whined and hung his head. "All these cravings, what is Yuko pregnant?"

Watanuki went very still and white, his entire body shuttered. "I think I just creeped myself out. "

There was no choice but to scale the wall. Whatever the reason for Yuko's demand, Watanuki could not disobey the sorceress. He looked high and low for some way around the wall. Another thirty feet from where his stood, Watanuki saw a tall willow tree with a couple of branches hanging close to the wall, if he could just scale that tree Watanuki would be able to hop the fence; he might even be able to land without breaking his neck.

The old tree's branches were low and easy to climb, almost like they were a ladder for any visitor to climb. Some things where just too easy, and Watanuki knew to be suspicious. However other than simply walking away and returning to Yuko empty-handed; the only thing Watanuki could do was climb the welcoming tree. He edged his way up the massive trunk until he was again panting with exertion and more or less at the height of the wall. It was evident that he would need to climb higher or his face would end up plastered against the middle of the barrier. As he climbed higher, Watanuki could see a fast garden just on the side of the wall, full of vegetables of every colour and shape. It was a sight to behold.

The long limb of the willow slumped from Watanuki's weight and sagged over the side of the wall, finally the teen was having some luck. Yuko's employee landed on his feet in between some red cabbages and went about his way in search of the illusive purple radishes.

Watanuki trudged along scanning over row after row off vegetables. There were pink cucumbers and orange bok choi. There was every colour of every vegetable, every possible kind of fruit or food, except for the lousy radishes. Watanuki heaved a sigh and hung his head, his arms dangling at his sides lethargically. As he was about to return to the wall and contemplate how to tell Yuko that there were no purple radishes, Watanuki saw a patch of the miraculous vegetables right along the front wall of a very tall tower.

"Somebody up there likes me!" Watanuki cheered before he tripped over his two left feet. "On second thought, everyone up there hates me."

With the Sun still bright, Watanuki grinned at the prospect of still managing to enjoy a little time with Himawari. He trotted over to roots and carefully picked three of the purple radishes.

"And what do you think you're doing stealing my radishes?" A rasping female voice asked from behind Watanuki.

"Eep!" Watanuki swallowed hard as he turned around. "Yuko wanted…"

"Yuko…!" The scantily clad woman hissed. "That witch is nothing but trouble. She thinks she can send her stooge into my garden and steal my vegetables, she has another thing coming.

Before Watanuki could even blink he was tied up with thread and sent flying into the tower. It did not take a genius to figure out that this was another prostitute spider. The woman came into the tower through the large window on her winding web. She leaned over Watanuki and grinned viciously as she spoke:

"For stealing my radishes, you are going to amuse me for a while."

"Nyah!" Watanuki screamed shrilly as the spider creeped up close.

"Watanuki's still not back yet," Mokona chirped and Yuko as she sipped her sake.

"He isn't, hmm?" Yuko raised her eyebrows. "If he doesn't get here soon, we will be having a late dinner."

Yuko clicked her and took a slow sip of her drink. Admittedly, Watanuki good have found some trouble in that garden, but Yuko was certainly not going to panic. The resident of that tower would not harm Watanuki, oh no, the spider knew better that that.

"Yuko-san?" Doumeki entered the shop and looked around for the witch. "Where's Watanuki?"

Yuko peered from her seated ad smiled smoothly at Doumeki in an almost Chester Cat grin. She leaned over and looked to the high schooler. She held her cigarette holder between her fingers and rolled it in her hand.

"Picking radishes, Doumeki-kun," Yuko purred, "at the house on the hill at the edge of town."

"Mmm," Doumeki mused internally.

"He has been gone a long time, but I have far too many clients to bring him back here…"

"I'll get him," Doumeki stated flatly.

"Excellent," Yuko grinned; Youko reached out and gave Doumeki an in descript looking fan. "You may need this.

Doumeki climbed leisurely up the hill. This was not a path he had ever noticed before, but then since he had been able to enter Yuko's shop, actually since he had spent any significant time with Watanuki, he had learned not to be surprised. Eventually Doumeki found himself at the wall. He saw the same tree Watanuki had found, he guessed this by the footprints Watanuki had left behind.

Without a pause, Doumeki ascended the tree and hopped over the wall without really any effort. Doumeki looked across the garden and could evidently see that there was no one there. In the distance, he saw a tower with a person leaning out the window. As he got closer Doumeki recognized the form as being that of Watanuki, though this was not Watanuki as Doumeki had ever seen him before.

Watanuki was clad in a dress, and not just a dress, a frilly, puffy, pink and purple dress. It was almost impossible to recognize his classmate as Doumeki noted that Watanuki was also wearing a long, gold wig.

"Watanuki!" Doumeki raised his voice as much as he ever did. "Let down you hair.

"What?" Watanuki peered down and was actually happy to see Doumeki. "Doumeki, what did you want me to do?"

"Let down you hair!" Doumeki repeated with his hands at his mouth.

"My hair?" Watanuki called down, confused. "This isn't my hair."

"It doesn't matter!" Doumeki called to Watanuki. "Use it as a rope!"

Although he was happy to receive rescue, Watanuki did not appreciate being made the idiot. Who says "let down you hair," anyway? Watanuki tried to take the wig off, but as he had figured out the moment the spider had put it on, that it would not come off. Thankfully there was a bedpost. The "princess in the tower," looped the three story long braid around the post and out the window. Doumeki wasted no time climbing the make shifted rope. Watanuki whined continuously as his own hair was bold with the wig. If the hair did not come off now, would it ever?

When Doumeki made it up, he immediately took hold of Watanuki's head and examined the wig. After a moment he brought out the fan that Yuko had given him and attempted to use the edge of the object to dislodge the wig. The false hair unwound itself from Watanuki's own hair before their eyes; leave it to Yuko to keep a fan for any purpose such as this.

Doumeki took the remainder of the braid and tied the top it to the bed before ensuring that the rest of it fell completely out the window. He glanced at Watanuki and considered his classmate's attire.

"Go first," Doumeki ordered.

"Why should I go first?" Watanuki did not know why he was arguing, it just annoyed him that Doumeki ordered him to.

"If we get caught I can hurry, you can't," Doumeki answered flatly.

There was no real point in arguing further, Watanuki knew Doumeki was right. The smaller of the two teens climbed carefully out the window and took hold of the braid. Watanuki swallowed nervously, his faced skewed with fear. Slowly, Watanuki edged his way of the edge and started down the rope.

As Doumeki had expected, Watanuki was terribly slow as he climbed down the rope. It was several minutes before he reached the ground below. He landed right out top of the radish patch. Despite his ordeal, Watanuki knew that Yuko would still want the funny purple radishes. While Watanuki picked the roots, Doumeki began his descend.

"Another one of Yuko's handymen," The prostitute smiled grinned maliciously at Doumeki . "Now this won't do, this won't do at all."

Doumeki looked up just in time for the spider to throw powder into his eyes. He shook his head violently. As Doumeki struggled with the irritation to his eyes he staggered down the rope. He let the rope slip, he held it tight, over and over Doumeki struggled until the prostitute spider cut the rope. He flayed with the rope and hit the garden floor hard.

"Doumeki!" Watanuki yelled in fright. The smaller teen hauled his friend to his feet and half led him and half dragged him through the garden to the outer wall. Watanuki looked up the wall and back at Doumeki. The taller teen still had the braid. Watanuki to it from him and tied the rope into a simple lasso. After a few attempts Watanuki managed to catch the branch with the rope and he pushed the braid into Doumeki's hands. The teen looked confused.

"Climb baka," Watanuki ordered sharply.

Awkwardly, Doumeki climbed to the top of the wall and clumsily fell off of it. Watanuki swallowed. He knew Doumeki well enough to know that he was not a clumsy person. From behind them, Watanuki heard the prostitute spider laugh. She was evidently not chasing them but it was enough to get Watanuki to scramble up the wall and over it, swing the rope over the other side and climbing down.

Doumeki was just sitting against the wall rubbing at his eyes. Watanuki dragged Doumeki up and together they ran back to Yuko's shop. As they went, Doumeki continued to wipe at his face, and Watanuki wondered while he steered Doumeki to the shop, if his friend if remembered where it was.

"Yuko!" Watanuki called as he dragged Doumeki into the yard of the shop, oblivious to the fact that he was still wearing a dress. "Something is wrong with Doumeki!"

Yuko met Watanuki in the doorway just when Watanuki managed to drag Doumeki inside. Once settled in the shop Yuko examined Doumeki for what could have been hours. Doumeki seemed confused and irritated. He didn't saying anything he would brush at his face and then look around. One time he seemed to know the people with him, at others he seemed frightened and blank.

"What's wrong with him Yuko-san?" Watanuki asked anxiously.

"The spider as blinded his normal eye, with that she has damaged his memory," Yuko explained. "Your shared eye is unaffected because of my magic. At times now he remembers who he is and who we are, but not most of the time."

"Can you fix him?" Watanuki almost begged.

"The eye is tainted, I can't purify it," Yuko answered evenly.

"You have to do something!" Watanuki demanded as he remember how frightening it had been to lose his memories bit by bit.

"The eye cannot be fixed," Yuko stated with finality.

"Than give him mine," Watanuki offered desperately.

"Doumeki-kun would not like that would he, ne?" Yuko asked. "You would only have the shared eye than."

"But he can't remember!" Watanuki exclaimed. "I can do fine not seeing right, but he won't if he can't remember."

Doumeki looked at Watanuki with recognition. He shook his head, hearing what Watanuki had said and answered Watanuki himself: "No."

"Doumeki?" Watanuki leaned over Doumeki.

"No," Doumeki repeated. "No self sacrifice."

It dawned on Watanuki what Doumeki had meant. When Doumeki had lost his eye to the first prostitute spider, Watanuki had given his instead because he felt to blame. This had bothered Doumeki, that was when he had gone to Yuko and they had begun to share Doumeki's eye.

"Of course!" Watanuki explained with a feeling of eureka. "Yuko-san! What if I shared my eye with Doumeki!:

"That can be done," Yuko nodded. "With a functioning eye Doumeki-kun's memory should return to normal."

The first thing that Doumeki remembered fully was Watanuki in the dress.

"Pink and purple frills?" Doumeki asked dryly.

"That's the first thing you say after all this!" Watanuki shriek shrilly and flailed his arms. "Why was I even worried about you? Why did I want you to remember anything? You're such a jerk!"

Watanuki went on and on, all the while flailing his arms as he had his fit. After a little while Watanuki and Doumeki sat together and ate boxed lunches Watanuki had made as they both adjusted to sharing each other's eyes. Though he did not say it, Watanuki could not have been happier than where he was, with who he was right then and there. Yuko called them inside and together the three if them ate the radishes Watanuki had managed to bring back.

"Why had you wanted me to pick these anyway Yuko?" Watanuki finally asked.

Yuko smiled in the way only she could and answered as only she could: "So we could sit together, the three of us, just like this."

End.

Author's note: I probably should have been watching the movie in my Religion class rather than typing this. Bah.

For the record I am interested in submitting this fic to a contest at a convention and would like constructive criticism and critique. Be as harsh as you like as long as you have a specific criticism. Flamers will be ridiculed and abused for my amusement.

Be forewarned that I am chat-speak illiterate and such reviews will be ignored.

This is me signing off.


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